the do-nothing kid By ChicagoTeacher

First, I would try to have a professional conversation with the parent of this child. Something along the lines of "Your son is growing up now and it is time he start to learn a little about responsibility". It's a difficult conversation because more than likely this mother will fight you, but it's something that needs to be said. This mother/family is hindering their child. I have also tried to extend this scenario into the future (do you want your teenage son to be entirely dependent upon you? what happens when he gets to the age where he doesn't do everything mom says anymore? etc...). It has helped me a little, and at least gives me a chance to share my observations with the parent. I would also tell this mother that whether or not he "wants to" he needs to learn certain things to pass second grade and that you need to be convinced that he has learned them (her saying "he does it at home with me!" isn't good enought!).

Then, I turn to the child. This boy is a student in your class, and is expected to follow your class rules the same as every other student. Do not accept his misbehavior (how you do that depends upon you, your school, etc.), but be sure to notice the positives. With the amount of "esteem building" the mother is doing, it'll probably take an overly-exaggerated response for him to even notice. Start with that, and then try to work your way back to a more "normal" response. In my class, students who refuse to work get credit for what they have done, which is NOTHING. Kids who play around and miss their chance to work in class either take home extra work or I have them turn in their blank work and grade it. They have no choice about it. I decide. It's my room, my assignment, my decision. If grades do not motivate this boy, perhaps the wake-up call to mom when the poor grades start coming will motivate him.

I'm rambling, but one idea I just had, if you can get the mom on board. It sounds like the mom is at school quite a bit and that the boy likes it. Maybe you could make an arrangement with the mom where if the boy gets a positive report, the next day she eats lunch with him (or whatever). If his report is negative, the next day mom doesn't come to school and eat with him. If you can get her to agree, that might make an impact.

Good luck and don't give up!! Your answer is out there somewhere!