love teaching?

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Home : 2001 : November : 13

love teaching?
By Jen

This is my my first year at a new school. I came from a very urban inner city school and was greatly looking forward to teaching in a very small rural school. I can tell you right now I'd give anything to have my little
gang bangers back. At least they wanted better for themselves. I understand exactly what you mean about kids not caring, bad behavior, uninterested parents, awful administration, etc. I'm not sure why I keep trying. I've never felt more frustrated in my teaching career. I have always prided myself on not loosing my temper in the classroom. I've never had a class that was so uncooperative

that I daily raised my voice. I have that this year--and I only have 16 students. I can honestly say that I began counting down the days to the last day of school the very first day I had these horrid children. I can also say that I will NOT be here next year. I know my limitations--and I have met them. I will finish out the year because I don't want these students to win the war. Every day is a battle. I'm not saying there aren't good days, but the bad out number the good. These kids have no ambition what-so-ever to make anything of themselves. We took a survey of what they wanted to do in college--out of the 16 only 2 said they wanted to go to college. The rest felt that since their parents collect welfare that they will also. I'm so glad they have such high goals for themselves.
I will say that every once in while--and by some miracle it happens--they do focus and there is actually a learning moment taking place. It is during these times that I feel that warm fuzzy feeling that tells me--"YES--this is why I do it." I love seeing the light bulbs come on--you can really see it on their faces when the "get it." So, no I won't be teaching in this same school next year, but I am researching schools right now for the area. I will start applying elsewhere, and I will continue to teach. I'm not sure if this helps answer the questions you have, but I hope it helps.