thoughts

Home

Chat

Blogs

Collection

Directory

Home : 2001 : November : 4

thoughts
By Cathy-Dee

I can see both sides to this story.

I do agree that the child should have counseling available to her if she still requires it, but I can see her homeroom teacher's point as well. We have a family whose father died 3 years
ago. We have done what we can to support all the kids, but the older girl still has a hard time dealing with things. However she also uses this to get out of doing work if she can, etc., by crying at every little thing. So although it seems we are hard on her, we also have to help her to get over using her dad's death as a means to get out of doing things she doesn't want to do.

And it is important for anyone to come to terms with the loss of a loved one and be able to move on as well. It's different for each person and perhaps this student just needed someone to listen to her that day and will be fine the next time you see her.

As far as the student you are talking about is concerned - did she have counseling when it first happened? What is her home life like, etc., it may be that she likes the extra attention she gets by bringing up the topic (to someone new like yourself) and that her teacher recognizes this. Or perhaps the child hasn't had any grief counseling and she really does need some support.

Why not talk with the Principal and see what he or she thinks? You could bring it up as a question, mention what had happened and that you did let her teacher know via a note, but you would like his perspective on how you should deal with it if this child approaches you during recesses, etc., and wants to talk more as you do not feel qualified to counsel her. By approaching it as a question on what you can do or should do, you are not questioning what the homeroom teacher is doing and therefore not stepping over the line. And perhaps the Principal is aware of things that he can share with you or if he wasn't aware of things he can put things into motion.