I can relate.

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Home : 2002 : April : 18

I can relate.
By JVF

A few months ago one of my students came up to me and raised up his shirt sleeve and showed me his arm. It was covered with marks. I asked him what happened and he told me that his mother hit him with a hanger. This child
had markings all over his arm. In addition, he had marks on his legs and head. Now, this student is one of my "problem" students. He's always getting in fights (after I saw this I wonder why) as a matter of fact, he had just come back to school from suspension for fighting. Anyway to make a long story short, He showed me his bruises and I brought him to my fellow grade level teacher (I

also teach at a Catholic School, 3rd grade) I told her what should I do, I know that we are mandated to report incidences of child abuse or suspected abuse, and if not, we can be held liable. However, I kind of know his mother and I happen to like her, and I know she has been trying to work with him. So, we were contemplating what to do? Part of me wanted to call her and say look you need to get some help obviously you lost it! I really didn't want to report it. Anyway, the little boy proceeded to show everyone in the class somehow, leaving me no choice but to report it. I took him to the office and my principal said that I needed to call CPS. They were very supportive. Even the assisstant principal who is a nun. Once I called CPS they said that they would send someone over to the school. I had to provide his mother's phone number, address, etc. They asked what I thought of her as a parent. I told them that this child is a constant behavior problem and I feel personally, that his mother had exhausted all of her possibilities and "snapped", however, I told them that I do not condone beating a child with a hanger by NO means. I found out (the next day) that CPS went to her home that same night, they were made to go to the hospital where pictures were taken of the child, and this incident is now on his mother's permanent record. (She didn't have one before). He told me that his mother was crying all night because she thought she was going to jail. I felt so bad. He also told me that his step-dad said that "whatever goes on in their house stays in their house." It was very uncomfortable for a while. The little boy goes to after school care and for the next several weeks whenever his step-dad picked him up his was very "cold" with the teachers. I wanted to call his mother and explain to her that her son went around the class showing and telling everyone. He left me know choice but, to report it. However, I just left it alone. Eventually, I saw her maybe, two weeks later, she hugged me and I told her I was sorry, she was crying a little bit. I explained how I had no choice, it's my job to report abuse or I could be fined or put in jail, and lose my job. Once, I put it to her that way she understood. If I had not reported it, all it would have taken was for one of the other students in my class to go home and tell their parents what happened at school ( this little boy showed me his bruises where his mother hit him with a hanger) and then who knows what would have happened. You said that his father is in law enforcement, then he should understand the obligation that your are under, legally. It's your job! I'm am sorry this was so lengthy, but, hopefully I've helped in a way. Good-Luck!