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answers to your questions.
By Kat

Barbara,

Thanks for responding. We have been trying, since I started this job, to give this child positive reinforcers. When he behaves appropriately, he earns something like free time doing what he wishes, a pencil, or
something small out of my "treasure" chest. We do not take it away if he misbehaves. I believe in the idea that once he has earned it, it is his, and I, too, felt that it would only confuse him if we gave he something for doing good, and then later took it away when he was bad. He just can't remember that far back. He is so impulsive. It seems like he forgets something he has done wrong

(or good) only minutes after he has done it.
I send notes home about things he has done good that day, no matter how little. I show him the note, telling him how good he was, and how proud of him I am. I tell him I like it when does good things. Usually, after I tell him this, he will be pleased for a few seconds and want a hug or a high five, then he will try to bite or kick me or call me dirty names. I don't know what the answer is.

If he does something wrong, he sits in his "sad" chair for a minute or two. The positive reinforcers do not really seem to be getting us anywhere...but neither does the negative (his sad chair). I am just about out of ideas.

The parents are very difficult. They offer no ideas, and say that he never misbehaves at home. We have learned his allowed to whatever he wants, whenever he wants at home, so of course, he won't misbehave there. They tell us that is all our fault this child acts this way and say its our responsiblity to make him mind. They offer no idea's how about how they would like us to deal with such situations, saying we should now how to deal with it, and that its all our fault anyway.
The parents are just fuming at us because we can't make him read. This is a child who cannot reasonably be expected to read. I try to tell them I am getting him to recognize and understand the meaning of survival signs to help him cope in the real world, but they don't want that. I can see that this little guy has soooo much potential. While he will always be a prolonged assistance individual, he has the potential to perhaps live in a group home or work in a workshop, but they will hear of no such thing, saying that he will always stay with them and after they die, he will go live with relatives. Its just makes me so sad.

I am simply going crazy with this job. The only person he will reasonably work with is his aid, who is a family member, and even then, its not often. Now, she wants to quit. I really just don't know how to get through til May. Thanks again for responding. Kat