12 year old friends

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12 year old friends
By lorla

Actually that is a flippant remark that goes back to parenting classes and books, about not being your child's friend, they need an adult. Which is not to say not be friendly or interested in them, because I am. I had a
rough class this year, my first year, not intentionally set up that way, thank goodness, although that sure does happen to some new teachers, just the student dynamics. I was advised by my prinicipal and another, experienced, teacher to be firm, and have zero tolerance for unacceptable behavior. I already thought I was doing that!!! but once I started looking closely I saw I was giving

too many chances to students. Once the worse offenders were dealt with promptly (usually just recess detention in my room) the others realized they should not follow down that path.

I guess what I mean by 12 year old friends is I strive to be fair, consistent, interested, interesting, and adult. If they do not like me because I am firm and no nonsense about class behavior and schoolwork that is fine. Too often teachers want the kids to like them and so are too "nice" when they really are craving someone to have high standards. I don't mean that I am mean to them, quite the contrary, but with 6th graders sometimes what they think they want is not the best for them. I genuinely like them and the age and I think they know that, in fact I tell them so every now and again, esp. that 6th grade was my choice of grades. My hope, that drives my teaching, is they look back and say, I didn't appreciate her at the time but my 6th grade teacher was one of the best for me. She cared, she challenged me, she wouldn't accept anything but my best.
good luck