I'm puzzled

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Home : 2005 : December : 15

I'm puzzled
By Ruth

Eydie,
This is my sixth year and I'm more exhausted than ever. I feel like a hamster running on a wheel and getting nowhere. Why do I have the largest group of special ed kids that I ever had? I'm a regular ed teacher
with 4 who come from the former self-contained, 4 from resource, one emotional disturbed who doesn't qualify for services, and several others who have Personal Literacy Plans because they're not reading on grade level.

What isn't working? I still haven't found the magic cure that comes from guided reading. The inclusion model leaves the regular ed teacher in the room alone

(maybe with an aide), with several special ed. students who can't motivate themselves to do the fourth grade curriculum. I have more absences from the average students than you could imagine. The new spelling programs have turned out the worst spellers I have ever seen. And today I was frustrated simply because my kids don't bring a pencil to class and all of the hundreds I've provided have probably been swept up by the janitor because the students don't pick up after themselves. Sorry I'm venting but the class I have this year is tiring me out more than you can imagine. I'm one year away from 50 and I'm feeling my age. Burned out? I don't think so because I'm still working toward their success for about 60+ hours a week. As my husband once said, "Do you remember your fourth grade teacher?" The sad truth is I don't and these kids won't be looking back either. I'm just doing what I have to do to get them prepared for the testing next year that reflects on my teaching this year.